Go Internet Explorers®!! Fight Team Fight!!

Husky Stadium and I go way back.

I saw it for the first time when I was 12 years old. But not for a football game. My family was taking a tourist boat ride through the locks, around Lake Union, through the Montlake Cut, and into Lake Washington. As we moved through the Cut, I saw the stadium, from exactly the same angle as shown here in the photograph. I stared in amazement.

I'd never seen circular pedestrian ramps like that, and I had no idea what they were. They looked like two giant worm drives. But what was their purpose, I wondered? They must somehow raise and lower the stadium roof, closing it up tight like a clam shell. But why? How totally weird! But then, when you're 12, much in life seems weird.

They soon will be gone. The worm drives, and the entire south side of the stadium, to which they're attached. Everything will be leveled, with the exception of the more recently constructed north stands. The existing stadium and field will be replaced by a new horseshoe stadium -- the stands moved closer to the field, with the track circling the football field eliminated. Plush new accommodations for wealthy ticketholders and end zone seating for those students who insist on attending games.

But the demolition of Husky Stadium will be more than the start of its renovation. It will also mark the end of the name "Husky Stadium."

The University has offered "naming rights" to the new stadium "in perpetuity." The school asks for a mere $50 million. If the $50 million isn't forthcoming, the school will auction off naming rights for periods of shorter duration. "Naming" is clearly the rage nowadays. For example, while the new stadium is being built, the Huskies will play downtown in CenturyLink Field, née Qwest Field, née Seahawks Stadium. And for further example, the basketball team this year will play in Alaska Airlines Arena; née Bank of America Arena; née, simply, Hec Ed Pavilion.

It doesn't stop with athletic buildings. New academic buildings are being named after corporate sponsors as quickly as they're being built. Ultimately, the sky should be the limit. Why not sell off naming rights to autumn, winter and spring quarters? To departments: DuPont Chemistry Department, GM Mechanical Engineering Department, Weyerhaeuser School of Forestry, Seattle Repertory Theatre Drama Department, FoxNews Creative Writing Department?

Hell, why not sell off the entire university? Allow our local companies to honor themselves -- for cold cash. The Amazon University of Washington? Boeing University of Washington? Or, more euphonically, Boeing State University? University of Microsoft? Yeah, that should work. And why Huskies? What have those Alaska sled dogs ever contributed to university coffers?

How about the Internet Explorers? The U. of Microsoft Internet Explorers. The IE's for short? Love that yell: Aiiiiiii-eeeeeeee!!! Go Explorers! Download the Cougs!

My wonder years -- my being a naive 12 year old -- that was a long time ago. We've come a long ways, baby.