Well, well! (the Orange Man in the White House again pontificates, sitting at his Twitter console). The Post Office, whose funding I have threatened to veto, should it be attached to any bill coming to me from Congress, no longer has enough money to handle the mail properly.
It seems that they can't deliver the mail on time, now that one of my Big Contributors and Friendly Cronies, who I recently appointed as head of the Post Office, has ordered his workers to let the mail sit around and gather dust for a few days, rather than make any special effort to deliver it on time. Tsk, tsk!
And the Democrats -- and disloyal Republicans -- want to allow just anyone to vote in November by mail? Their ballots to be delivered by the Failing Post Office? That's clearly impossible. We don't talk about "snow, sleet, or gloom of night" under my Administration.
And people seem to have trouble voting in person, especially in big cities, because there has suddenly developed a shortage of polling locations. Big lines. People packed together. With the pandemic? Ohhhh, you might catch the Liberal Flu, and die.
Maybe it would be best if we just put the silly old election off until a more convenient time. Like after everyone's forgotten my peformance over the past year, and people are feeling richer and less angry. Yes, I may exercise my Royal [strike that] my Executive Prerogative to postpone the election until a better time.
The above in part is only my dark imagination of what went through Mr. Trump's mind, and in part a paraphrase of bits and pieces of tweets and offhand comments he may have made. You know it's not verbatim from the President's mouth because of all those entire sentences and the relatively adequate grammar in which I expressed it. And no CAPITAL LETTERS or !!!!!!!!! exclamation points.
Mr. Trump was, as so often he does, merely thinking out loud. To the nation and to the world. On Twitter. And as he once more claimed, he was "just kidding," but only after not only only Democrats but several influential Republicans expressed shock at his suggestion, and reminded him that Congress sets election dates, not the President. It's there in the Constitution, Mr. President. The one you vowed to uphold? Yes, we appreciate that you're not a lawyer, but that's why you have the Department of Justice -- to consult before you say things you wish you hadn't.
I don't know what to believe. Are his tweets a reflection of the idle stream of consciousness that passes through his rarefied "very very big brain"? Or does Mr. Trump, in coordination with his campaign staff, actually have some carefully planned strategy in mind? Perhaps a plan to so poison the voters' minds about the validity of the balloting that they won't even bother to vote, leaving only his devoted Base to decide the election?
I suspect everyone by now has made up his or her mind about this president, and has decided how he will vote. Although the polling margins are so slight in several possibly decisive "battleground" states that neither side can afford to be either complacent or defeatist.
Like most of us, I just want the election to be over. And, if necessary, to watch U. S. Marshals escort the reluctant "President Who Would Be King" from the White House. Kicking and screaming at how "unfair" life has been to poor him.
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